A Mission of Ample Proportions
by k u r r o p o i
Summary: Just when you thought missions were suppose to be serious, Team 7 steps into the picture. With the team consisting of Neji, Sakura and Naruto, read and see just how far they get when they have to escort the prince of Torigakure!


**YES! I have risen from the dead! All zombie like and what not! Yes, laugh at me. Anyway, I am back! My other story is being worked on, because I was not satisfied with it. And so, I have granted you with this lovely backwards story of action, adventure and a truck load of stupidity. Not only that, there is only one implied couple in this ENTIRE story ( it's a crack one too!) But don't worry, there is NO romance in here, I made sure of that!**

**So, instead of you reading my nonsense, go ahead and attempt to read this story ( I hope it won't suck!) Also, they are all shippudenated, just to let you know!**

**Disclaimer: I not own Naruto! If I DID well┘┘(evil sadistic face)  
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**...noise **

**"..." talking**

** '...' thinking **

**_Italics _ whispering **

** Chapter 1: Mission Supposedly Impossible**

They stood, waiting and waiting...and waiting because one certain blonde idiot, was still asleep. Now, you'd think that his two teammates would casually walk up to his door and make him get up, but that wasn't the case. They didn't have to do such a thing. Since a greater force was at work.

SNOOOOOOOORE!!! the blonde one did in his deep sleep, legs and arms everywhere, blanket strewn on the ground, hair looking more like a giant birds nest, with all sorts of weird objects hidden beneath. His older sister stood hovering over his sleeping form, her hands akimbo to her hips, foot taping on the floor. She shook him violently and he still laid there sleeping the day away like there was no tomorrow. She got frustrated and took her giant fan and nudged him hard in the side and he still, remained sleeping. Soon, she had enough.

"NARUTO WAKE UP!!!", she screamed. Temari was not someone who liked to wait, especially if she has to be persistent. Naruto jumped up and fell out of the bed, looking up at his angry older sister. She crossed her arms and he attempted to win her over with a smile.

"O-oh! Good morning! How's it going? I miss anything?" he asked. And what a stupid question it was.

"What the hell kind of question is that?! Your team has been waiting forever for you to get the hell up!!

"Really? They'd wait for little ol' me?! How sweet!" he said stupidly, his eyes shining. Temari rolled her eyes sneering.

" Shut up and get some clothes on! You lazy bum!", she said dragging him.

"I am not a bum!" he yelled back.While outside, Neji and Sakura stood down below the apartment, hearing the crashing of dishes and the sound of a body being thrown around like a sack of potatoes.

"It's a shame that we have to go through this every morning! I'm surprised she didn't kill him yet." Sakura said. Neji shook his head.

"Don't worry, in about a day or so we'll find his body; mutilated, covered with bruises and paper cuts." he said. Then they looked up to see the dressed blonde fly out of he window screaming for his life and landing on his face. They looked back up to see Temari stick her head out.

"You'd better get up when I tell you to next time! You freeloader!" she said slamming the window closed. Sakura and Neji looked down at the poor boy who was taking his sweet time getting off the ground.

"Man! That crazy hefer! Always yellin' at me and throwing stuff! Ugh!" he said dusting his pants off and looking at his teammates.

"SO!...what are we doing?!" he asked. Sakura's mouth dropped open and Neji almost wanted to slap himself.

"For the ten-thousandth time, we're going on a mission! How many times do we have to tell you this?!"Sakura asked.

"..." he sad nothing.

"Naruto? Are you listening?" she asked. He took a double take and finally looked her way.

"I'm sorry, what?" he asked. Sakura was about to beat his head in when Neji intervened.

"Aside from the fact that we're late, we might as well not be even more late by leaving." He said. Sakura and Naruto nodded while the three walked to the hokage's office.

* * *

Tsunade sat back in her chair, chugging down sake like there was no tomorrow. She propped her feat onto the table and let out a burp that echoed into the room. Once the door to the office clicked, she panicked and threw the sake bottle out the window and sat properly In the seat. The three younger shinobi stepped into her office.

"Ah! You FINALLY made it here! And in only 2 hours! How nice! That was much faster than last time! I think that last was 4? Oh who cares! Now, all joking aside, I suppose you've come for the mission?"she said as they all flinched when they heard something fall onto a passerby's head and they screamed as loud as possible.

"Yes Tsunade-sama. You called for us?" Neji asked. Tsunade nodded.

"Yeah . Anyway, this mission requires your utmost attention and I expect that it should be completed with out fail!" she said specifically."Now, your mission is to escort the prince from Torigakure (totally made up village!). Just to let you know, this mission will take you at least 3 weeks to get there, depending on how many times you stop to rest. Not only that, a word of warning to you, the prince is a little... well, he likes to say things that you might not want to hear, but please don't try to kill him, or it'll be MY ass! Do you understand the mission?" she asked them. They all nodded, but then Naruto, spoke up.

"What do WE get in return?! I expect a reward! Like, oh, I don't know cough RAMEN!!!cough HACK!! he said covering his mouth while coughing. Sakura sweat dropped and Neji had the biggest vein on his face that you could see it from space.

"Hell no! I'm not buyin' you ramen! And don't make requests like that! You haven't even started the mission yet! Now get out of my office! I need some ME time! Which doesn' involve YOU!" she exclaimed. The three walked out of her office and strolled into the town.

"OoooooOh ! I miiiiiiisioooooon! Too awesome! And it's a BIG one! Finally! We get an awesome mission and not some ol' delivery boy, cleanin' lady, babysitting fiasco!" Naruto said.

"Yes that and I didn't think you knew how to use the word "fiasco" in a sentence." Neji said. Naruto jerked his head around to the Hyuuga prodigy and glared a thousand daggers at him.

"I swear to god Neji! One of these days, I'm gonna sneak into your house and chop off that do-rag offa your head!" he said. Once you talk smack about Neji's hair, all hell breaks loose.

"Oh no wait a minute wait a minute! You don't go about dissing my hair! And don't even get me started on that rats nest you call your hair!" he said back. The tension was enough to break glass.

'Oh great, dee-dee-dee and duh-duh-duh are a it AGAIN!'

Sakura thought. She turned her head to see two familiar faces.

"Well, I see you three are real friendly with each other this morning." Shikamaru said in a monotone sarcastic voice.

"Ano, g-good morning." Hinata said walking up next to him after catching up. The two fighting males stopped to look toward their fellow shinobi.

" Oh! Good morning Shikamaru! Hinata! How are you?" Sakura asked.

"We're fine actually. Just taking a stroll. Then, we stumbled onto you three, and obviously, nothing special but the usual is happening.■ Shikamaru answered.

"Y-yes, we were j-just passing by." Hinata answered after him. Naruto and Neji looked at each other grinning, they knew something was going on between the two.

"How convenient. Did you two just meet? Or you planed on walking together?" Neji asked his dear cousin and Shikamaru.

"Okay, so we planed it. Is that a problem for you?" Shikamaru asked.

'Oh dear Kami, here we go.' Sakura thought, sweat dropping.

"No, no problem!" Naruto said snickering along with Neji. Hinata and Shikamaru exchanged glances in a confused manor. Sakura sighed.

"Okay, look; these two, including myself and a lot of other people think you two have something going on, but hey, it doesn't mean that we know whether it's true or not!" Sakura said honestly but defensively. Hinata and Shikamaru stared at each other and them back at the three. Then Shikamaru spoke up.

"Well, DUH. We've be together for like-" he said until Hinata cut him off.

" Three m-months." she answered. Neji and Naruto just stared at them with dumbest faces that anyone could have ever seen. Sakura's eyebrows rose as far as her face would let them go.

"Well, it was nice talking to you, but we'd better get going." Shikamaru said as he walked off slowly and Hinata walked after him.

"Bye guys!" she yelled back when she turned part of her body. Neji and Naruto kept the same faces for the longest period of time until Sakura had waved the two good-bye.

"Three months? Three?! How is that possible? We haven't seen them do anything remotely close to suggesting that they even go out!" Neji exclaimed, failing to understand the situation.

'Man they're good!" Naruto exclaimed right back to him. Sakura rolled her eyes.

"Well, aside from that bit of gossip, we'd better discuss the mission so we'll be prepared for tomorrow." she suggested.

"Of course." Neji said reverting back to his calm demeanor.

"Alright! Discussion-ization!" Naruto said as they walked along.

* * *

The three shinobi sat at a table in the sweets shop, discussing the mission before hand.

"Well, in my opinion, I think that I should be the leader, seeing as I am the prodigy here." Neji proudly suggested. Naruto frowned his usual goof frown and Sakura didn't even need to think about which direction the situation was going to go in.

"Well whoop-dee-friggin-doo-daa-friggin-day Neji! Yeah, sure you're mister wonderful genius man! But lets face it, that man-skirt you're wearing ain't helping the leader situation. I mean come on! Look at that thing! It screams girly-man!" he said to Neji. A vain on Neji's forehead wasn't visible, but you could tell it was there through his hitai-ite.

"Well since we are the subject on a persons clothes, let's talk about YOU!", Neji said harshly towards him. Sakura knew it was coming.

"For instance: I hope you know that Halloween ended months ago!" Neji said to him. Naruto knotted his eyebrows together in anger.

"Perm!" he screamed.

" Weed-head!" Neji screamed back. ( a/n: Neji is not good at comebacks.)

"Man-skirt!" Naruto said back.

"Candy corn colors!" he said back again.

" LE GASP!Well!...You smell like broccoli!" Naruto said back. Neji face faulted and Sakura almost busted a lung laughing.

"Okay! Okay. Please, enough. It's getting pretty late, and we'd better head home so we can get a good nights sleep for the mission tomorrow." Sakura said. Neji and Naruto replied with a "yes" and looked at each with complete hatred. They all got up from the table and walked past a few people with scare expressions on their faces from their little argument. Once they got out onto the main street, they bid each other good night.

End Chapter 1

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**Well! So far this is the first chapter! So, what did you think? Did it suck? Or was it good? I must know!!! So it would help if I get some reviews! ( hint hint nudge nudge) And I guess now you know the implied couple now! Not only that, you can see there are a lot of things changed, but I won't tell you everything here, just when ever that time occurs in the story. Yo umay also notice that alot of the characters are OOC! And guess what? that's what makes this stroy more fun to write!**

**Yep, Naruto and Temari are related! No Gaara or Kankuro to be found, but don't worry, they are in this story!**

**Yes, Neji replaces Sasuke, but that doesn't have ANYTHING to do with the original plot of Naruto, but still, yeah Sasuke is in here too, you just won't see him until later.**

**But yeah, I pretty much noticed that I wrote A LOT, and I tend to do that once I start writing a story, so expect this a lot as well! Until chapter 2 JA'NE! ( review please!)**


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